As an extrovert, spending more than a few minutes by myself makes me a bit edgy. I start getting antsy to be doing something. This kind of antsy nature seems to swell until I finally do something…and I tend to go overboard. It’s when I tend to get impulsive, irrational, and to be completely honest, intoxicated. This obviously is hugely more negative than positive, and I need to work on alone time not starting suc a change reaction. We do need our time alone, even us extroverts, but it needs to be regulated.
Today, I have spent a lot of time alone. I started with going to the gym. I jogged on a treadmill for twenty minutes, while listening to the Mowgli’s. It made me happy, I got to feel my body work, and I achieved the second day at the gym this week that I planned on going to. I’m spending time alone now, while I’m writing. It’s just me, my tablet, and my words.
Writing being a solitary thing does mean I spend quite of bit of time alone while I’m doing it. Of course, I find ways to socially interact. I make sure that I go to places where things are happening. I am at Two Boots Pizzeria today listening to the families interacting and the staff joking back and forth. It gives me something to subconsciously pay attention to as I put down my words.
The gym is the same way. I get a glance to other people, see them working out, and knowing like myself they’re getting stronger. It gives me a sort of boost to keep going and do what I’m doing. I can just sit on the treadmill, listen to my music, and not focus on anything around me while just letting my body do all the work. Of course, the music pulls me away from my own thoughts and leaves me thinking only about my body working on the machines.
To actually be alone, I would need to put away my phone and exit myself temporarily from social media. I would need to take a step back when at home and just breathe in the silence. Of course, then my cat would jump on me and I’d no longer be alone.
This has been something that I have wanted to work on for some time. I started reading “Mindfulness in Plain English” as recommended to me by Charmaine. It’s a book about meditation, which I have been wanting to learn and do for years. As I began to read it, it connected with a couple other works I have read within the last few years. Last year, I read ‘The Secret’ which resonated with me and connected back to, oddly, Alan Moore’s Promethea series. These books are changing my world look, and helping me imagine myself in a better and balanced place. It will be interesting to see where the year goes as I try to build the first floor on the foundation of my life.
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