Sixty-Day Superhero – Day Thirty-Eight

It’s Valentine’s Day! Okay, I’m not really going to write about Cupid and all that mush, although if you want to know a secret, my favorite myth of all time is Psyche and Eros. Love and the Soul coming together after many hardships. Enough of that. I said I was going to write about Cupid and Valentines Day, I did not say anything against writing about love.

Love is important in our lives. It keeps us feeling warm and fuzzy. Some people are luck enough to find people who give that that emotions, while others, like me, have to find it in ourselves. Now, loving yourself isn’t easy. And that’s really what I wanted to talk about today. I wanted to talk about this complicated topic that permeates through everything in your life.

I wish it was just as easy as snapping your fingers and feeling the love. Instead, there’s a much deeper side to it. You have to love your faults, all of them. I was talking to my friend yesterday about such things. I have had a relative that I have said on numerous times that I hated. My friend asked me what did I hate about them. I said they were mean, deceitful, and unkind. My friend then said ‘you’re mean, deceitful, and unkind’. I was stunned, but I understood where he was going. He was kind enough to explain that the negative aspects I saw in that person were aspects of myself. I had been having dreams about confronting and arguing with this person for years. And it was all about confronting myself and those aspects in myself.

I am mean, deceitful, unkind, abusive, homophobic, and a million different negative things. I am also kind, compassionate, loving, caring, and a million different positive things. We aren’t just perfect beings going out into the world being perfectly negative or positive. We are both, which makes us each unique. Now, we also have to accept this and internalize that acceptance.

That is not the easy part. I do not know if I accept that person being a reflection of me with those negative qualities, but the more I say it, the closer I get to accepting it and moving on beyond it. It gets me one step closer to loving myself, all of me.

I am not pretending loving oneself is easy. We have a billion different trials and tribulations. I cannot hope to know and explain and talk through every one of them. This is a process we all must go through on our own to figure things out. It brings us up to the next stage in our life. What was awesome was after I wrote my post about ‘outlook, lifestyle, and look’ yesterday, this conversation happened to help me begin to change my outlook on things. It’s all a process, and it’s all a path, but in the end, I know I’m going to be the best me I can. And it starts by looking inward and accepting all the flaws and imperfections as well as the greatness inside.

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